Quarantine, Or, "What I Do With My Time When I'm Stuck At Home with Two Sick Kids"

Well, this is Day Two of being stuck at home with two sick kids.  Cold for one, bronchiolitis for the other.  Unfortunately, the one with the bronchiolitis is Sawyer.  I have to give him albulterol with a spacer that I have to hold over his mouth.  Every four hours.  Before you ask, Yes, this is as fun as it sounds.  The older one is just puny with a cough and fever and is so pitiful, I've let him watch TV pretty much non-stop since yesterday morning.  I'm the BEST mom. 

Except for when Phineas and Ferb has been on (I challenge anyone to find a better show on TV!), I've been forced to curl up in the fetal position mentally and find a happy place.  This happy place has given me a lot of time to ponder the really important questions in life.   Questions like, "Are Sandra and Ryan really getting it on?", "When will Brangelina finally do us all a favor and break up?", and, most importantly, "Did LiLo really break probation while she was in Betty Ford and can she actually be sober?!?!"

Let's tackle important issue Numero Uno, well..... first.  Now, as soon as Ryan Reynolds and Scarlett Johannson split, I told Michael, "He should hook up with Sandra Bullock."  Michael tried to argue that she's too old for him, but I know my celebrity history.  If Ryan Gosling wasn't too young for The Ultimate Cougar when he was 19, why on EARTH would Ryan Reynolds be too young for her at 34?  Apparently, they spent New Years Eve together.  Yeah, yeah, it was in a group.  But if I were her publicist (or his), I'd say, "Sure, go ahead and date, but for the love of all things Hollywood, DO NOT DO IT WITHOUT A COVER."  So, in my opinion, the fact that they went in a group is a sure sign that they're doing it. 

I'm tired of being teased with Angelina and Brad Break Up Stories.  Do it already.  Two actors that I really enjoyed separately have lost all credibility with me together.  Remember Bennifer?  The combo name that started it all.  When Ben Affleck went down that bumpy road we call JLo, he just suddenly seemed smarmy.  And no longer like that dude you wanted to go have a beer with.  When people's fame becomes bigger than any of the work that they do, it's time to quit it.  Brad and Angelina, at one time, were just really good actors that I thoroughly enjoyed watching.  They could blend into a move and be a part of it.  Now they ARE the movie.  Could you imagine Brad Pitt in Seven now?  Or Angelina in Girl, Interrupted?  No, because they'd overshadow the movie itself.  And then there's the self-righteousness of it all.  If I thought for one second that all the adoptions and charitable giving weren't for show, I wouldn't be bitchy about it.  But it just doesn't ring sincere when people are so public with their "good deeds."  They just bug me.  And they need to stop it. 

And, finally, Lindsay.  Oh, dear Lindsay.  I have to admit that I enjoy the spectacle of it all.  The jail, the courtroom, the FU on the fingernails....  We all love a good train wreck, so long as nobody gets hurt.  That's why Britney was so much fun.  Until she shaved her head and locked herself in a bathroom with one of the chitlins.  Then shit got REAL, she got straightened out, and now I actually like her, where before I couldn't really stand her....  At least with Blohan, I liked her before the downward spiral.  I mean, who doesn't LOVE Mean Girls?  "It's like I have ESPN or something."  She needs to get back to doing the good stuff.  And by good stuff, I mean movies and not drugs.  But, maybe nobody will hire her junkie butt and that would be a tragedy.  I mean, we could be looking at the next Robert Downey, Jr.  But with boobies.

Yes, these are the things I've thought about for two days. 

I never said I was deep or anything.